All I Want For Christmas (Is Peace Of Mind)
by theothersusan
Summary: During the 12/06/2016 episode of GH, Kevin said something very important to Laura. This is what happened after.
1. Chapter 1 (general audiences)

**Author's note: This picks up with Kevin's final line in the 12/06/2016 episode of GH and also includes references to my earlier story "Are You Going To Let Me In?"** _ **The adult content is all in Chapter 2, which you may skip if you prefer without losing the thread of what's going on.**_

"And there it is-that amazing generosity of spirit. Just one of the reasons I love you."

It took a moment for those last three words to sink in, partly because Laura was still thinking about Charlotte and partly because they were so unexpected. Not that she was surprised to know Kevin felt that way, necessarily-the man _had_ thrown himself in front of a loaded gun for her-but because she hadn't expected him to say it yet. Certainly she hadn't expected him to say it while she was standing in front of him a crying mess.

But Kevin obviously meant it. She could see the love in his dark eyes as clearly as she'd heard the words. How long had it been since someone looked at her like that? Actually, Laura wasn't sure anyone had _ever_ looked at her quite the way Kevin was now.

Laura knew she needed to speak. The little boy at the door was growing increasingly insistent, and they probably only had another minute or so before he was joined by an equally strident parent. The time to say something was now. She opened her mouth-

-and the words _I love you, too_ stuck in her throat.

It was true. It was absolutely, incontrovertibly true. But every single time she had ever said those words she'd lived to regret it. Maybe not immediately, but eventually. And knowing that Kevin wasn't Luke or Scott or Stefan went a long way toward reassuring her...but not quite far enough, not yet.

She felt her eyes fill with tears. Kevin deserved to hear her say it back. He deserved a lot of things she was terrified of not being able to give him.

But he didn't look disappointed or angry or any of the other things she might have expected. In fact, he was smiling softly, shaking his head a little.

"This isn't a test, Laura," he said gently. "You don't have to say anything. Just promise me, please, that you'll be here when I'm done with this?" He nodded toward the door, indicating the boy outside and by extension the entire crowd of children still waiting to see Santa.

 _Promise me you won't run away again_ was what he was really saying, and Laura nodded quickly. She could give him that much, at least. "I'll be here. I promise."

"Thank you." He laid his hand on her shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "Now, why don't you go check on Lulu while I open the door before this kid knocks it off the hinges, and we can talk later?"

That had been nearly three hours ago, and Laura was feeling much calmer now. She had gone to check on Lulu and found her talking to Dante about the strange connection she felt to Charlotte. The three of them had agreed that at the very least the girl was family via Nikolas and Spencer and therefore their business whether Valentin and Nina liked it or not. They would keep an eye on her as much as possible, and if any of them saw even a hint that Valentin might be mistreating her they would take action. Until that point, though, there didn't seem to be anything they could do other than exactly what Kevin had suggested-accept the situation as it was.

Dante and Lulu left to take Rocco home, and since they were apparently alright Laura simply told them that she was going to stay and wait for Kevin. Lulu seemed to sense that something had happened between the two of them, but she accepted Laura's subtle head-shake with equanimity. (Which was a sign, Laura would later realize, of how very rattled Lulu actually was.)

Then it had simply been a matter of settling in to wait for Kevin, who was turning out to be a far better Santa than he'd thought he might be, not that Laura was surprised by that. He was a good listener, patient and compassionate and naturally gentle, and kids who might have balked at talking to most strangers were happily chattering away with him while their parents looked on in varying states of amazement. Laura made a mental note to ask him whether he'd ever considered specializing in working with children.

She had seated herself on a bench in the back corner of the room, and Kevin occasionally looked up and shot her a smile, checking in with his eyes. Laura smiled back, doing her best to nonverbally reassure him that she wasn't about to bolt. She wasn't even tempted to bolt, actually. Getting to watch Kevin from afar like this for a while had been exactly what she needed to settle her nerves. Every time he coaxed a shy child to speak or made a funny face to get a frightened child to laugh, she was reminded not only _that_ she loved him but _why_ she loved him.

Because he was wonderful.

Kevin was so much more than just _not Luke_ or _not Scotty_ or _not Stefan_. If she had sat down and made a list of the qualities she longed for in a man she could love...well, she would've had a pretty dead-on description of Kevin. Smart and strong and funny and gentle and kind and honest and warm and...just everything. And while she wouldn't necessarily have gone so far as to add _handsome_ or _amazing in bed_ to her list, she certainly wasn't going to complain on either count.

Nor was it lost on her as she sat here watching him that Kevin had quite a following among a certain demographic of the hospital staff, namely single mothers. He seemed oblivious to the fact, but from Laura's vantage point it was clear that quite a few of the moms in scrubs were more interested in chatting with Kevin than they were in letting their kids talk to Santa. If the man really hadn't been on a date in two years-and Laura didn't doubt his word on that point-then it certainly wasn't for lack of opportunity.

Which presumably meant that whatever _his_ wish list might have looked like, Kevin thought he'd found those things in her. That realization was both heartening and humbling. Kevin really believed all the wonderful things he'd said about her. Written about her, too, in that "book" that read like a novel-length love letter, which was easily the most extraordinary thing anyone had ever given her.

Just as Laura was pondering that, Santa's hours finally ended, and the last stragglers slowly filed out, leaving a very relieved-looking Kevin to lock the door behind them and peel himself out of the top half of his Santa suit. His hair was plastered to his head, and his undershirt clung damply to his back and chest, confirming Laura's impression that he was severely overheated. Fortunately, she had anticipated that.

She crossed to join him by the door and held out the Gatorade she'd gotten from the vending machine a few minutes ago. She'd had to guess at a flavor, but Kevin either really liked grape or was too thirsty to care, since he drained it in about three gulps.

"Thank you," he said with feeling when he came up for air.

"I'm proud of you," she answered, and meant it. Playing Santa hadn't been an entirely comfortable thing for Kevin, but he had done it without complaint, and he'd been great. "Do you need another Gatorade?"

"What I need is a shower," he said ruefully. "No wonder Santa lives at the North Pole-it's the only place he can stand to stay in that outfit."

Laura laughed and moved in to hug him, cheerfully ignoring his half-hearted attempts to fend her off.

"I'm a mess," he protested.

"Hug me anyway," she answered, and he gave in, wrapping her up and hugging her tightly.

"Are we okay?" he murmured into her hair.

"We're good," Laura said, and drew back to look up at him, studying his eyes for a long moment before softly requesting, "Say it again?"

Kevin didn't pretend not to know what she meant. "I love you," he repeated, looking her in the eye.

This time Laura was ready. "I love you, too."

His eyes widened, and she realized with a pang that he really hadn't expected her to say it back. So she reached up and pulled him down into a kiss, doing her best to convey exactly how certain she was. She didn't care that he was a sweaty mess, half in and half out of a Santa suit and tasting of grape Gatorade, and she kissed him until she was certain he didn't care either. Until he had her body pulled tight against his, and Laura was balanced on her toes to get closer still.

"Take me home," she murmured when the kiss finally broke, trusting him to understand that she didn't mean she wanted to go back to Lulu's house.

"Laura-"

"Please."

Kevin proceeded to set what had to be a new world record for fastest-change-out-of-a-Santa-suit, emerging from the nearest men's room in a dry t-shirt and jeans in less than two minutes. From there it was an interminable elevator ride down to the parking deck followed by a brief but thoroughly enjoyable makeout session in Kevin's car, which lasted until he finally disentangled himself, ordered her sternly to keep her hands to herself lest he cause an accident, and drove them back to his place without even speeding. Much.

It took all of Laura's self-control to keep from touching him. She was intensely aware of him physically, of the way his body occupied the space beside her and of his movements as he drove. It didn't help at all that Kevin's car had a manual transmission, which meant that every time he shifted gears his hand was _right there_ a few inches from her leg. Laura had kind of a thing about watching a man drive stick anyway, and Kevin did it effortlessly, not that she really needed any more evidence that he was good with his hands.

They managed to make it all the way into his house and get the door locked behind themselves before they fell on each other, which Laura counted as a major victory. Two steps inside the door, though, he had her pressed back against the wall kissing her senseless, and she gave up on thinking actual thoughts and let herself sink into the pleasure of being lovingly seduced by a man who knew exactly what he was doing.

 **Author's note 2.0: Remember, Chapter 2 is the adult part. If you prefer a more daytime-TV style fade-to-black, skip ahead to Chapter 3.**


	2. Chapter 2 (adult)

**Author's note: This is the adult part. Govern yourselves accordingly.**

Kevin's right hand was buried in her hair, but it didn't take him long to work his left hand up under her tunic, and the heat of his touch on her bare skin made her body arch against his. He slotted his thigh between hers and pinned her a little more firmly, and Laura moaned into his mouth. Then his hand found her breast, caressing her through her bra, and the moan became a desperate whimper.

He broke the kiss and rocked his hips against hers, watching her avidly. His pupils were so blown he almost looked drugged, and when he spoke his voice was a lower, rougher version of itself. "I could feel you watching me in the car. Tell me what you were thinking about."

"How badly I wanted you to touch me." Her own voice sounded strange in her ears, and she could only imagine how she must look to him right now with her hair mussed from his hands and her lips swollen from his kiss and her skin flushed with arousal.

"You were staring at my hands," he whispered, lowering his head so that his lips grazed her ear. "Tell me what you were thinking about. Tell me your fantasy."

"You were…" She licked her lips, suddenly dry-mouthed. "You were cupping my breasts."

"Like this?" he murmured, and gently palmed the breast he had been teasing, taking its weight in his big hand.

Laura shuddered. "Yes. No. You were behind me."

Kevin made a wonderful little growling sound against her ear and rocked his hips again. "Was I inside you?"

"Y-yes. God, Kevin, _please…_ "

"Is that what you want?"

She managed to nod.

"Bed," he said, drawing back to look at her hungrily. " _Now."_

Kevin released her, and Laura peeled herself off the wall and headed for his bedroom, very aware of his eyes on her as he followed. "Kevin Collins, are you checking out my ass?"

"Yes, I am," he answered, unrepentant.

Laura laughed, more at herself than at him.

"What?" he asked.

They had reached the foot of his bed, and she turned to smile up at him. "At first I was a little afraid I might not be your type. It's nice to know I was wrong."

"You didn't think I found you attractive?" He looked almost comically stunned.

"Lucy and I aren't exactly built along the same lines," Laura pointed out, and mentally kicked herself. Now probably wasn't the best time to mention Lucy.

But Kevin took it in stride, giving her a slow, deliberate, head-to-toe once-over she could feel like a physical caress before returning his eyes to hers. "Believe me, honey, there is absolutely _nothing_ the matter with your lines."

Laura felt herself blush, as much at his apparently unconscious use of _honey_ as at the actual compliment. "Are you sure?" she teased. "Maybe you should check again."

"Alright," he answered, and turned to sit down on the end of the bed, making a little _Go ahead_ motion and looking a challenge at her.

 _Walked right into that one, didn't you?_ Laura thought to herself, and reached gamely for the top button of her tunic. It had been quite a few years since she'd put on a show for anyone, but watching Kevin watching her was unexpectedly hot. In fact, by the time she reached the lowermost button and shrugged off her top she would have sworn that the temperature in the room had risen ten degrees. He was looking at her like...well, like a man looking at woman slowly getting naked in front of him, but with Kevin there was another layer underneath the masculine appreciation, something solely for her.

She deliberately turned her back to him to bend over to take off her boots, and the way his breathing changed confirmed that yes, he did in fact have a thing for her ass. So she took her time about it, letting him look. By the time she turned back to face him his eyes were nearly black with desire, tracking every movement of her hands as she unfastened her slacks and let them fall, stepping out of them to stand in front of him in nothing but her bra and panties.

"Still no qualms about my lines?" she asked, and the huskiness of her own voice surprised her.

Kevin swallowed hard but continued to play the little game they had going. "I don't know. My view is still somewhat obstructed."

Laura decided that if he could still use the word _obstructed_ in a sentence, she clearly wasn't trying hard enough. So she unclasped her bra and slipped out of it, allowing herself to sigh at the sensation of relief. "God, men have no idea how good it feels to be out of one of those things."

Her audience of one laughed unevenly. "Probably about as good as it's going to feel to be out of these jeans."

Laura dropped her gaze to his lap, where the bulge in his Levi's was unmistakable. "Go ahead if you're...uncomfortable," she said, and gave him back her own version of his earlier _I dare you_ look.

He obliged, now watching her watching him as he opened his fly, slowly popping one button at a time. She got a better show than she'd bargained for, and _goes commando under jeans_ added itself to the running list of things she had learned about Kevin. _Has a very nice package_ was already on that list, but now suddenly seemed like a good time to review that item.

She hooked her thumbs in the elastic of her panties and pushed them down, stepping out and letting them dangle from her fingertips as she crossed the small space between them to stand between Kevin's spread legs. His erection was standing up against his belly now, and she trailed the soft fabric over him, knowing he would still feel her heat. His entire body jerked in reaction, and Laura smiled. _Lay a three-syllable word on me now, mister,_ she thought, and almost laughed. She hardly recognized this playfully seductive version of herself, but damn, this was fun.

Whatever self-consciousness she might have felt earlier had definitely faded, and she lowered herself to her knees between his feet without a qualm, slowly dragging her nails along the denim covering his thighs and looking up at him, making absolutely sure he was watching her before she licked her lips. She could clearly see the moment Kevin realized where this was going, and the way his eyes went wide was a memory that would stay with her for a long time. Granted, it had been a while since she'd done this, but she couldn't imagine that Kevin would complain if she was a little out of practice.

And she was right on both counts-yes, she was out of practice, and no, Kevin definitely wasn't complaining. Especially not after she took his hands, which he was valiantly keeping down at his sides like a good boy, and raised them to her head, lifting up off him long enough to say clearly, "Show me what you like."

Even in the throes of passion he was remarkably gentle, burying his fingers in her hair but not restraining her or pulling her down. His guiding touches were subtle, just enough to help her know what felt good. He also had a wonderfully varied repertoire of pleasure sounds, and pretty soon Laura was almost as turned-on as he was just from listening to him.

Then about the time she got into a groove, having finally remembered the knack of breathing without losing her rhythm, he was suddenly pushing her away. For a moment she was startled-had she somehow hurt him without meaning to?-but then she realized that his latest sound was actually a word, albeit a barely understandable one: _Close._

She _had_ originally intended this to be foreplay, but she was enjoying herself and no longer wanted to stop. Which meant she needed to let Kevin know that, since he was too much of a gentleman to assume. Again she raised up enough to speak clearly, looking up into his wide, wild eyes.

"Come for me. I want to watch you."

And she went right back to doing what she'd been doing, paying close attention to Kevin's tells as he approached the point of no return. Not that she had any intention of backing off this time, but on some future occasion she'd love to see exactly how much teasing he could take before his control slipped. The biggest thing she noticed was that the filter that normally prevented him from cursing in front of a lady failed spectacularly near the end, every other breath becoming a harsh, gasping _fuck_ just before his hands fell back to the bed, clutching at fistfuls of the covers as he came.

Laura stayed with him through it, swallowing slowly around him and rubbing her thumbs over his hipbones as he shuddered. He was almost silent, and she couldn't help wondering whether that was a natural quirk of Kevin's or whether he had trained himself to be quiet. When his shaking subsided to fine tremors she finally pulled away, and he collapsed backward to lie heaving for breath, his left hand coming down to search for hers.

So she crawled up to lie beside him, propping herself up on her elbow and slowly running her free hand over his belly and chest as he returned to himself. He turned his head and looked at her, or tried to-he seemed to be having a little trouble getting his eyes to focus. Finally he gave up, closing them again before saying weakly, "Wow."

Laura laughed. "Thanks."

"Did my brain _actually_ leak out my ears," he asked after another moment, "or does it just feel that way?"

She made a show of checking, brushing his hair away from his ear and peering at it as he laughed. "I think you're good."

"I certainly _feel_ good. I can't even remember the last time I felt this good." He stretched and opened his eyes again, having more luck with the focusing part this time. "Give me another minute and I'll return the favor."

"You don't have to," she answered, meaning it. Kevin was a very generous lover, and it really wouldn't have bothered her for this time to be all about him. But he looked so affronted by the suggestion that she couldn't help laughing. "Of course, if you _want_ to…"

"Oh, I want to. Just as soon as I can feel my hands again, because I'm thinking that might be helpful."

"Probably," she agreed, laughing again, and moved to kiss him, giving him something to do that didn't require the use of his hands. Something he was very good at-it wasn't long before her own simmering desire was back to a rolling boil. Which happened around the same time he sank his fingers into her hair, apparently having regained his manual dexterity. He nudged her over onto her back and started to follow her, then suddenly stopped, looking down at himself with an expression of consternation.

"What?" Laura asked.

"I'm still _dressed,_ " he said, and he sounded so genuinely astonished by the observation that this time she laughed until she nearly cried.

"Wow, you really _were_ out of it."

"Like I said, you melted my brain," he answered, laughing with her rather than taking offense. "Just a second."

Laura watched as he scrambled off the bed and undressed. She didn't get the slow striptease he'd gotten, but honestly at this point she wasn't sure she would've had the patience for that anyway. Her body was pretty insistent about the fact that it was her turn now.

He did, however, take a moment to stand just looking at her before he lay back down, murmuring aloud, "God, if I were twenty years younger…"

"If you were twenty years younger you'd kill me," she said matter-of-factly. "Not that I wouldn't die happy, mind you-"

Kevin grinned.

"-but there would be no way I could keep up with you."

He lowered himself over her and kissed her quiet, then began to work his way down her neck, kissing and licking and softly sucking. Laura laid her hands on his shoulders and nudged him southward, feeling him smile against her skin.

"Bossy," he accused.

"Tease," she shot back, and felt his shoulders shake.

Then his mouth was on her breasts, and she forgot everything except how very, very good at this he was. She could almost come from this if it was done right, and Kevin was an artist. Before long she was moving restlessly beneath him, arching up in search of more pressure, more friction, just _more_. His weight shifted, and all at once his clever fingers were there between her legs, seeking and stroking.

"Like that," she breathed when he got it perfect. "God, yes, don't stop. Kevin-" Her voice broke, and a wave of heat washed through her, leaving her dizzy and gasping.

Kevin gave her a minute to recover, slowly moving downward and leaving a meandering trail of kisses in his wake, then lowered his mouth to taste her as his fingers pressed inside. Tension began to coil low in her belly again, gradually winding tighter and tighter until she was shaking uncontrollably, teetering right on the edge of something incredibly powerful. "Please," she whispered. "Please, please, _please…_ "

She wouldn't even be sure, later, exactly what he had done differently, but all at once the stars aligned and she was in freefall, reality suddenly sliding sideways like something out of _Alice in Wonderland_. The room spun, and a voice-hers?-said something, and then there was darkness.

When the world came back into focus the first thing she saw was Kevin, propped up on his elbow and watching her like she was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen.

"Welcome back," he murmured.

"How long was I gone?" She truly had no idea-it could have been twenty seconds or two hours.

Kevin smiled. "A couple of minutes. Nice place?"

"Mm-hmm." She stretched luxuriously, arching her back and feeling every place her muscles were going to be sore tomorrow. It had been years since she'd felt so gloriously aware of her own body. " _Damn,_ you're good."

She hadn't exactly meant to say that last part out loud, but it was difficult to be sorry when Kevin was so obviously delighted by the compliment. "Thank you," he answered.

"Come here," she said, and reached out to tug at him, craving another kiss.

Kevin hesitated. "Oh, I haven't, uh-" He scrubbed his hand across the lower part of his face, then sat up, starting to reach for his discarded t-shirt.

"I don't care," Laura answered, and pulled him down into a kiss anyway. She'd never understood people who were that fastidious about sex. Yes, she could taste herself on his mouth. Wouldn't it be weirder if she couldn't, considering what they'd been up to? She could feel his surprise, but after a few seconds he relaxed into the kiss, apparently accepting that it didn't bother her.


	3. Coda (general audiences)

**Author's note: For those of you joining us directly from Chapter 1, a very good time has been had by all, and Laura and Kevin are now snuggled up in bed together, kissing.**

They melted together, and Laura hummed in bliss. This was her favorite kind of kissing, long and slow and lazy in the afterglow, all the intimacy with none of the urgency. And Kevin seemed to share her enthusiasm, which made it even better. They lay entangled like that for quite a while, happily trading control of the kiss back and forth until finally Laura shivered, her body having cooled enough for the room's chill to penetrate.

"How does a hot bath sound?" Kevin suggested, drawing back a little.

"Marvelous, especially if you're planning to get in with me to play lifeguard. Because I'm pretty sure I could swim laps in that tub." Kevin's recent renovations had included the installation of an antique claw-foot tub that had to be close to eight feet long, and Laura had gazed longingly at it for a few minutes earlier that morning before reluctantly opting for a quick shower before Tracy showed up with her clothes.

Kevin laughed. "Ah, the truth comes out-you only love me for my bath fixtures."

"Your kitchen appliances, actually," she answered, managing to keep a straight face.

He made a dramatically wounded sound and flopped onto his back, and she finally let herself crack up.

"Know what I really do love about you?" she asked when she stopped laughing. "One of the many things, I mean? The fact that you don't check your sense of humor at the bedroom door. I'd forgotten that sex is supposed to be _fun_."

"Well, reminding you has certainly been my pleasure," he answered, grinning. "You just about blew the top of my head off earlier."

"I enjoyed that as much as you did," she assured him.

His smile gentled. "You know something I love about you? One of the many things? How fearless you are. From coming over here last night in nothing but that coat to sticking around today when I opened my mouth and my heart fell out, once you make your mind up about something you just jump with both feet."

"Because I know you'll catch me."

"Always," he answered, looking her in the eye, and Laura recognized the simple declaration for what it was-a vow. Kevin was a man who measured his words very carefully, and she didn't doubt that he had said exactly what he meant.

"Always," she echoed, and felt as if some unseen thing clicked into place in the space between them.

They stared at each other for a long, suspended moment, and then Kevin nodded once- _That's decided_ -and said briskly, "Would you prefer to fill the tub or raid the fridge?"

"Fill the tub," Laura said instantly. The bathroom had radiant heating under the tile, and she had no desire to go stand in front of an open refrigerator sans clothing.

Kevin chuckled, clearly onto her, but nodded. "Okay. I'll be back."

Laura watched him go-if he could enjoy her rear view, she could certainly return the favor-then took herself to the bathroom to fulfill her end of their bargain. It was probably good that she would have a couple of minutes to herself. This time yesterday she had been at Lulu's house, feeling like a guest who had begun to wear out her welcome and also feeling, if she was honest, lonely...and a little afraid that she might _always_ be lonely. And now here she was with Kevin, who loved her and made her feel safe and wanted and cherished and the farthest thing in the world from lonely. The change was wonderful, obviously, but it had happened so quickly that she half-expected to wake up on Lulu's couch and find she'd dreamt the whole thing.

Except that she didn't think her subconscious mind could have concocted the idea of Tracy shoving her out the door in nothing but a fur coat. Or of Kevin answering his door in a Santa suit and nearly scaring the life out of her. Those two things, at least, must have really happened. Which meant the rest of it had really happened, too, and she was actually standing here in real life watching Kevin's Olympic-size bathtub fill with steaming water and listening to him rattle around in the kitchen.

And most amazingly, she wasn't over-analyzing any of it. Kevin's presence had a way of stilling the hamster wheel in her mind, as if he had reached out and put his hand on it and gently suggested that the hamster might like to take the day off. Certainly the past twenty-four hours had offered no shortage of things to freak out about-the good (Kevin loved her!), the bad (Lucy Coe probably wanted her dead), and the ugly (Valentin Cassadine was _raising a child_ , God help them all)-but on the whole Laura felt surprisingly calm.

If all hell might break loose tomorrow, well, that was all the more reason to enjoy today. And today was looking pretty damn good, since she couldn't imagine any scenario that involved food, a hot bath, and a naked Kevin (not necessarily in that order) ending badly. Sure, tomorrow might be another story, but she knew something it didn't-whatever tomorrow brought, it wouldn't be finding her alone.


End file.
